"You have to HAVE balance between giving and receiving...You give too much...All you ever do is take care of others." We have all heard it, right? I know I have, and I have probably even said it. We have convinced ourselves that there is something wrong with giving with our whole hearts, like that somehow sends the wrong message to the Universe. I am so tired of that message. I don't believe it. I believe that some people were born with a spark in their soul to nurture everyone they come across. Can we please stop shaming kindness and generosity?
Sure, giving can become toxic. If you start to feel bitter and resentful of those you are caring for, it may be time to back off a bit, to get some perspective. It is up to each of us to self monitor our own emotions and act accordingly. Givers struggle to receive sometimes. That's okay. It's not a crime. Just say yes to some help every once in awhile. Don't strip another giver of their desire to serve you.
Our society is a big fan of finding ways to make people feel shame and guilt. How have we managed to fall into the toxic belief that being kind and generous with our time and resources means that we are not taking care of ourselves? It IS possible to be a giver all while taking great care of ourselves.
For all of you givers our there who wear themselves out taking great care of others, rock on! I know you. I know that you are giving your whole heart with a smile on the inside. I know that the comfort and happiness of others is your drug of choice. I know that you wouldn't have it any other way, and I love you for it.